Seth Meyers

Even in 2008 – which was probably the most exciting political cycle I experienced while at SNL – there was a sense of a hangover afterwards. But this time, it has been relentless, and we’re only relentless in what we’re doing because [the Trump administration is] so relentless in what they’re doing. So this is all a reactive relentlessness.

Donald Trump has been saying that he will run for president as a Republican, which is surprising since I just assumed he was running as a joke.

I feel like everyone you mentioned owes an enormous debt to Jon Stewart’s Daily Show, because I think that started this trend of people having talkshows where they have a point of view that they’re not afraid to share.

I couldn’t have asked for a better target than Trump

In the middle of everything that I’ve done as a singer or as somebody who’s jumped on top of a few old books and turned ‘em into songs about hobbits f*cking vikings, I think I’ve danced a beautiful dance through it all, without becoming too much of a cliche. I’ve enjoyed the two-step. It’s brought me great gifts.

Student debt is like HPV – if you go to college, you are most likely to get it, and it will follow you for the rest of your life.

[on Stephen Merchant] He’s eight foot tall, has stupid glasses, awful hair, but it makes me look good, which is why he’s in the series. We look so strange on screen together as well. The height difference is ridiculous. I want people to know that he is a freak and I’m the normal one. Don’t look at this and go, ‘What? Didn’t know Ricky was a dwarf.’ I’m not. He’s the weird one.

If you want to make an audience laugh, you dress a man up like an old lady and push her down the stairs. If you want to make comedy writers laugh, you push an actual old lady down the stairs.

When I go to see Iron Man 3, I’m not as enthralled as I was when I saw The Bridge on the River Kwai.

I didn’t think my career would last this long, and it’s still going.

I was asked to come to Chicago because Chicago is one of our fifty-two states.

[To a psychedelic rock sextet call Strawberry Alarm Clock] We’re going to get you six Ed Sullivan shows and we’re going to get you on Janis Joplin’s next tour. [After the meeting on being told by Schiffman ‘David, what are you doing? Six Ed Sullivan shows? Are you kidding? Janis Joplin wouldn’t piss on these people! We are not going to give them any Janis Joplin dates’] If they have another hit, we’ll get them one Ed Sullivan show, and we’ll get them a couple of dates on somebody else’s tour. I don’t care. And if they don’t have another hit, well, f*ck ’em.

[on motherhood] I feel good, I’m proud of Election (1999) and very proud of this (her child). It couldn’t be a better time. It’s always the right time when it happens. You make it the right time.

Thats the worst thing, I dont really care if people say I’m a bad actor, I can like work on that, but if they just say that he’s ugly thats just like “oh.. really?”

I don’t normally do shoots in bikinis – I’m just not that kind of girl. But for ‘Maxim’ I was like, ‘Bring it on!’ I wanted to wear the higher heels and the skimpier bathing suit. I figured I’d go for it!

I’m not perfect! I’m human. I make mistakes. But I try to be as conscious as I can about things I should be. If I’m going to do something commercial and mainstream and made for the masses, I just believe you can make those kinds of films with quality – and good ideas and good intentions. There’s a lot of negativity out there.

I get more people approaching me about how good I was in ‘Napoleon Dynamite’ than being in Coldplay.

Definitely tougher to be vulnerable. As a woman in the industry, you try so hard to remain strong and to not let your guard down. And once you let the walls down and let people see that you were a regular person who has feelings, sometimes people take advantage of that. I think that applies for everyone. It’s always a little bit nerve-racking to just completely let your guard down because you just don’t know if people are going to appreciate it. And then if they don’t appreciate it, you can feel like you did it in vain.

Every race is a chapter. Those are two important races. Who knows what Sunday will bring?