Robin Williams

[on his acting career] All the new people you meet, it’s pretty amazing. The vampire needs new blood. And there is still a lot to learn and there is always great stuff out there. Even mistakes can be wonderful.

Ah, yes, divorce … from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man’s genitals through his wallet

[on Popeye] If you watch it backwards, it has a plot.

You can start any Monty Python routine and people finish it for you. Everyone knows it like shorthand.

Spring is nature’s way of saying, “Let’s party!”

Everyone has these two visions when they hold their child for the first time. The first is your child as an adult saying ‘I want to thank the Nobel Committee for this award.’ The other is ‘You want fries with that?’

I get crazy in a bookstore. It makes my heart beat hard because I want to buy everything.

I knew I could always work harder and be better and show I’m more prepared. I had a whole science to, like, how you have to arrive 17 minutes early to something. If you’re 20 minutes early, that means you’re too eager, but 17 minutes gives you time to, like, settle, sign in, use the ladies’ room, have some water, and get comfortable.

Making a movie requires 20 to 500 people to make and a lot of money and the stakes are a lot higher.

I don’t weigh myself. I just go by if my clothes fit. I try not to participate too much in the incredible amount of wasted energy that women have around dealing with food. I just feel like being healthy is sort of a job requirement to be on TV, and being a writer is so much coping with fatigue and stress, and you just eat. You eat to stay awake.

If my fans want to do something for me when that time comes, I say, don’t waste your money on me. Help the homeless. Help the needy… people who don’t have no food… Instead of some big funeral, where they come from here and there and all over. Save it.

I used to be better looking than this.

There is no one of-woman-born who does not like Red Lobster cheddar biscuits. Anyone who claims otherwise is a liar and a socialist.

I have standards I don’t plan on lowering for anybody, including myself.

Any time that people think enough of you to put up something that’s everlasting is only going to make you feel good.

[asked about the ways she is discriminated against] I get discriminated against in three ways: I get discriminated against because I’m blond, I get discriminated against because I’m an actress and I get discriminated against because I’m from the South.

I didn’t get on TV until I was 30, which is really fortunate because you are who you are at that point.

I’m just incredibly fortunate that my eyes and ears have been opened. I have to be honest with myself and remove as much of the repetition and fakery as is humanly possible. To soothe the savage heart, we have to repeat ourselves sometimes – that’s entertainment.

Easter is very important to me, it’s a second chance.

I prefer being as far from the centre of celebrity as possible.

I always choose roles that are, you know, hopefully different from the last role. I don’t wanna do the same thing over and over again because that’s, well, first of all that’s no fun.