Mark Twain

Civilization is a limitless multiplication of unnecessary necessities.

In Boston they ask, How much does he know? In New York, How much is he worth? In Philadelphia, Who were his parents?

It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either of them.

No sinner is ever saved after the first twenty minutes of a sermon.

Where a blood relation sobs, an intimate friend should choke up, a distant acquaintance should sigh, a stranger should merely fumble sympathetically with his handkerchief.

The human race was always interesting and we know by its past that it will always continue so, monotonously.

I was kosher until I had my Bar Mitzvah, and I parlayed officially becoming a man into telling my father I wanted to eat cheeseburgers.

The difference between what we do and what we are capable of doing would solve most the worlds problems.

An intelligent hell would be better than a stupid paradise.

I’ve been up the mountain and I had a choice. Should I come down? So I came down. God said, Okay, you’ve been up on the mountain, now you go down. You’re on your own, free. Check in later, but now you’re on your own.

When the student is ready the teacher will appear.

When you hear that all beings are Buddha, don’t fall into the error of thinking there’s more than one Buddha.

The Kingdom of God is Within You,

The Bible does not need advertising by me, but I wish more people could be persuaded to read it. Perhaps if they had been, we should not have this war on our hands. For greed and idleness brought it on.

You believe in a book that has talking animals, wizards, witches, demons, sticks turning into snakes, burning bushes, food falling from the sky, people walking on water, and all sorts of magical, absurd and primitive stories, and you say that we are the ones that need help?

It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either of them.

In order to fulfill yourself, you have to forget yourself. In order to find yourself, you have to lose yourself.

What about Jesus Christ? I say that he was a precursor of idealists; a precursor of socialists.

To understand everything is to forgive everything.

If you are a Christian, you are in danger. If you decided to abandon your faith and become an atheist, you also are to be liquidated according to their concept. You are in danger if you decide to become a Muslim. It is not going to save you anyway because they believe traditional Islam is hostile to their goals.

Children, Fear God; that is to say, have an holy awe upon your minds to avoid that which is evil, and a strict care to embrace and do that which is good.