Mark Twain

Habit is habit, and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed downstairs a step at a time.

There is no character, howsoever good and fine, but it can be destroyed by ridicule, howsoever poor and witless. Observe the ass, for instance: his character is about perfect, he is the choicest spirit among all the humbler animals, yet see what ridicule has brought him to. Instead of feeling complimented when we are called an ass, we are left in doubt.

Beautiful credit! The foundation of modern society. Who shall say that this is not the golden age of mutual trust, of unlimited reliance upon human promises? That is a peculiar condition of society which enables a whole nation to instantly recognize point and meaning in the familiar newspaper anecdote, which puts into the mouth of a distinguished speculator in lands and mines this remark: – I wasn’t worth a cent two years ago, and now I owe two millions of dollars.

Let us endeavor so to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.

The rule is perfect: in all matters of opinion our adversaries are insane.

Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.

Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.

Lying has a kind of respect and reverence with it. We pay a person the compliment of acknowledging his superiority whenever we lie to him.

I teach that all men are mad.

He who can, does. He who cannot, teaches.

There are no grades of vanity, there are only grades of ability in concealing it.

The only thing that is ultimately real about your journey is the step that you are taking at this moment. That’s all there ever is.

The great advantages of simulation and dissimulation are three. First to lay asleep opposition and to surprise. For where a man’s intentions are published, it is an alarum to call up all that are against them. The second is to reserve a man’s self a fair retreat: for if a man engage himself, by a manifest declaration, he must go through, or take a fall. The third is, the better to discover the mind of another. For to him that opens himself, men will hardly show themselves adverse; but will fair let him go on, and turn their freedom of speech to freedom of thought.

A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.

Glances of true beauty can be seen in the faces of those who live in true meekness.

We allow our ignorance to prevail upon us and make us think we can survive alone, alone in patches, alone in groups, alone in races, even alone in genders.

From a worldly point of view, there is no mistake so great as that of being always right.

The greatest part of a writer’s time is spent in reading, in order to write; a man will turn over half a library to make one book.

To fear death, my friends, is only to think ourselves wise, without being wise: for it is to think that we know what we do not know. For anything that men can tell, death may be the greatest good that can happen to them: but they fear it as if they know quite well that it was the greatest of evils. And what is this but that shameful ignorance of thinking that we know what we do not know?

Assassination is the extreme form of censorship.

Employ your time in improving yourself by other men’s writings so that you shall come easily by what others have labored hard for.